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Really? A Straight Pride Parade?

Robert Franklin

Posted on June 7, 2019 20:17

2 users

I don't think "equality" means what some people think it means.

A recent Facebook post from a friend of mine perfectly sums up the new trendy complaint from the American non-subjugated:

"People whining that there's no 'straight pride' like Old Navy's Fourth of July sale doesn't happen next month."

It's really a perfect rebuttal to a growing pseudo-controversy. Apparently, since LGBTQ+ "pride" parades are a thing, and the historically upper crust of American moral and socioeconomic class aren't being featured front and center at said events, suddenly that upper crust -- missing the point of the event entirely -- think they should be entitled to a similar celebration.

It's like how some white people tend to lose their minds that White History Month doesn't exist, or when men get wigged out over a Women's March.

Some look at a Pride parade, realize there are no parades for straight people, and demand equal cultural treatment, even though being straight in the United States does not condemn one to a life of bigotry, violence, and second-class citizenship.

Straight people don't get murdered for being straight. They don't find themselves subjected to pseudo-scientific, supernatural bigotry, like "praying the straight away" or torturous conversion therapies. They don't commit suicide at disproportionate rates because of said bigotry and violence. They don't turn on the news and watch as their struggle for equality is equated to an argument about cakes.

Progress has been made in America when it comes to LGBTQ+ people, but some of the most important factors that would contribute to full civic equality have not taken place and are actively being fought. There isn't any federal legislation that outright stops companies from discriminating against LGBTQ+ people when hiring or firing, based on their sexual orientation. Obama-era directives for LGBTQ+ people have been reversed by the Department of Justice under President Trump. LGBTQ+ people are not afforded protections from hate speech. There's no federal prohibition of conversion therapy for LGBTQ+ minors. There are no public accommodation protections for LGBTQ+ people. Transgender Americans, as of April 2019, are once again no longer allowed to serve in the United States military.

Gay men cannot donate blood unless they abstain from sexual contact with another man for twelve months.

Straight people don't have to deal with anything like this, yet some believe that despite the relative ease of their lives when it comes to social acceptance in a predominantly heterosexual country (not to mention among a predominantly heterosexual species), all things being equal (which they aren't), straight people are deserving of a celebration of their hetero-normalcy, a thunderous procession of totems of straight icons like John Wayne and the Brawny Paper Towels Guy, buxom women in tiny bikinis, and floats powered by beef jerky and Miller Lite.

Such a display would ultimately be horrifying (this means you, Boston). But rest easy, heterosexuals of America, as someone who commented on my friend's Facebook post so thoughtfully observed:

"Ford Truck Month is happening soon."

Robert Franklin

Posted on June 7, 2019 20:17

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