It must be disheartening to be a Democrat right now. After all, Democrats' attempt to impeach and remove President Trump from office failed earlier this year in such perfunctory fashion as to be all but forgotten right now.

Even more demoralizing for members of the Democratic Party? It’s down to either former Vice President Joe Biden or Bernie Sanders in terms of nominating a presidential candidate in hopes of denying the president’s re-election in less than nine months.

Aside from the unappealing nature of candidates Joey Gaffes and Bernie the Red themselves, the party of diversity that pushes identity politics has seen its voters whittle down their choices for president to two septuagenarian white men. (As of this writing, Tulsi Gabbard is still in the race, but only technically.)

In a further nod to irony, both men are loaded – not Mike Bloomberg or Trump prosperous, but very well off – which comes across as even more hypocritical given the Democratic Party’s demonize-the-rich economic agenda.

But back to the last two old, rich white men left standing for Democrats. Biden, the current frontrunner, has secured that status – for now – not because of genuine "Joementum," but rather as the beneficiary of the fact Sanders' radicalism scares the bejesus out of establishment and moderate Democrats.

Of course, Biden comes with his own set of problems. His goofy verbal blunders that used to part of his folksy charm have since devolved into poor debate performances and cringeworthy lapses on the campaign trail that have many questioning his mental acuity. That’s on top of Biden’s history of being wrong on every major foreign policy issue of the last half-century, embellished stories that are embarrassingly self-serving and plagiarism.

The jury is still out on whether Biden has the intestinal fortitude to weather the rigors of a general election campaign against a politically merciless opponent.

Sanders, in contrast to "Sleepy" Joe, is not lacking in ebullient vitality and energy, in spite of suffering a heart attack last year. The main stumbling block to Sanders securing the nomination is ideological – that is, his penchant for being on oddly incurious man when it comes to socialist-communist regimes to the extent he only sees the good in them, like literacy programs and breadlines. It turns out Sanders is a genuine useful idiot.

Furthermore, Sanders' plans to massively grow government horrifies the Democratic powers-that-be whose common sense informs them this would be a liability in a general election.

In what can only be a frightening preview of the future, the Biden and Sanders campaigns are currently bickering over the particulars – to sit or not to sit – of their candidates' March 15 debate. Beware the Ides of March match between these grumpy geezers. It will be like watching Statler and Waldorf going at each other, but with a lot less coherence and dignity.

Congratulations, Democrats, on your no-win scenario.