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2020 Vision? A Dozen Political Predictions for the New Year

Brett Davis

Posted on December 31, 2019 00:44

3 users

Prognostications for the next 365 days in civics, here and abroad.

1. The State of the Union speech will get super awkward when President Trump turns around and directly dares House Speaker Nancy Pelosi to deliver articles of impeachment to the Senate, saying, “I’ll wait.” Which he does, for a full excruciating minute before continuing with his address.

2. Britain will finally leave the European Union per Brexit. Critics will be stunned – stunned! – the island nation doesn’t sink into the ocean as a result.

3. Democrats will continue to refuse to believe they can ever lose an election fair and square, sticking with the notion that every defeat at the ballot box is the result of a nefarious conspiracy (Russian collusion, voter suppression) or a national cultural defect (racism, sexism, stupidity).

4. Critics from the left will denounce Crayola’s decision to name a color after the president: Trump orange.

5. Pelosi will realize too late she’s the Wile E. Coyote to Trump’s Roadrunner when holding up the articles of impeachment blows up in her face like an ACME rocket.

6. Unctuous teen climate change activist Greta Thunberg will become so smug that she evolves from crude physical matter into a luminous being of pure energy.

7. Joe “Joey Gaffes” Biden will shockingly claim the Democratic presidential nomination based on the conventional wisdom he has a better chance in the general election than his more left-of-center competitors.

8. Democratic voters will experience buyer’s remorse when during the presidential debates a confused Biden constantly shouts, “Malarkey!” and keeps asking what year it is.

9. The mainstream media in America will go the entire year – again – without acknowledging its liberal bias, instead pretending to be straight shooters and acting perplexed as to why the fourth estate is held in such contempt by so much of the country.

10. In an October surprise, Hillary Clinton decides to – ah, never mind. Who the heck cares?

11. Democrats’ secret plan in the event of the death of Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg during a Trump presidency will be revealed. Needless to say, Operation Weekend at Bernie’s shocks the conscience of the public.

12. President Trump will not be removed from office, but he will be re-elected, leading to a record-breaking flood of liberal tears and prompting an embarrassing on-air suicide watch for the folks at MSNBC. (See No. 3 on this list again.)

 

Brett Davis

Posted on December 31, 2019 00:44

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