PROFILE
Robert Franklin
United States
- Texas
http://www.thezephyrlounge.wordpress.com
@rfranklin626
BIOGRAPHY
One night, a drunk man bet Robert that he couldn't eat five Wendy's Baconators in an hour. Robert bet he could, but his wife intervened in the oneupmanship and settled the debate: "He most certainly cannot!" With potential unrealized, Robert started writing to fill the hole in his confidence that could have been filled by Baconator calories. He has had positions as an Internet-based political pundit, petition writer, editor, and pop-culture philosopher. Robert believes in the power of learning -- having been indoctrinated into education by School House Rock re-runs and obsessive reading of Eyewitness books during childhood. He is an avid, albeit tortured, fan of the San Francisco 49ers and the Boston Red Sox. Robert is also a man occasionally capable of irrational hatred, aimed primarily at Michael Bay movies, "Simply Having a Wonderful Christmastime," and continental breakfasts.
LATEST OPINIONS
Rumination on a Post-Dobbs World
July 13, 2022
Patrick's Folly: Why a Pennsylvania Democrat is Trolling the Lieutenant Governor of Texas for $3 Million
December 30, 2020
Life Defined by an Emo Kid
May 02, 2020
A Saturday Afternoon at the Leaning Tower of Dallas
March 01, 2020
The Burdens of Immigration
January 27, 2020
The Outer Worlds
January 24, 2020
Why All the Quarreling Over Equal Rights?
January 15, 2020
A Labor Subsidy
January 09, 2020
Spoiled Immortality and Immortal Spoils
January 04, 2020
An Open Letter to Dallas Cowboys Fans
December 26, 2019
If Only I Could Read His Thoughts
December 19, 2019
Michael Vick: Pro Bowl Captain
December 11, 2019
Existence Has Officially Jumped the Shark
December 07, 2019
Fire Jason Garrett
November 30, 2019
500 Words on My Inability to Write Novels
November 23, 2019
Chapter 86: Genesis or the Big Bang
November 15, 2019
500 Words on Speech
November 07, 2019
Do the Evolution
November 01, 2019
Who Needs Integrity Anyway?
October 24, 2019
Waiting for the End of the World
October 17, 2019
I'd Probably Buy W. a Beer
October 10, 2019
With Turpentine Kisses and Mistaken Blows
October 03, 2019
Soundbender
September 27, 2019
A Disturbing New PSA
September 18, 2019
An Asphyxiating Vaping Industry
September 12, 2019
A Few Thoughts on the Importance of 1960s Counterculture Music
September 04, 2019
To Defund Disaster Relief Ahead of Impending Disaster
August 29, 2019
The Badge of Freedom
August 24, 2019
To Preserve Human Life, Look to the Stars
August 17, 2019
Rated M for Moronic
August 10, 2019
I Pledge Allegiance...
August 01, 2019
500 Words on Capital Punishment, Thanks to William Barr
July 27, 2019
Our Grand Wizard-in-Chief
July 18, 2019
Robert Foster's Campaign Quagmire
July 11, 2019
The President's Crack-brained Independence Day
July 03, 2019
Some Musings on Sentencing
June 28, 2019
Let's Call a Spade a Spade
June 20, 2019
Goodbye, Sarah
June 14, 2019
Really? A Straight Pride Parade?
June 07, 2019
The Specter of Roy Moore
May 30, 2019
Mr. Ratburn Did What Now?
May 21, 2019
Texas' Abortion Overhaul
May 18, 2019
Made... In Georgia
May 11, 2019
500 Words on Constitutional Originalism
May 02, 2019
Musings on the Conservative Cinematic Universe
April 23, 2019
The Intersection of Anti-Vaxxers and the Holocaust
April 15, 2019
A Dilemma: Why Do We Still Have Zoos?
April 08, 2019
This Supreme Court's Aberrant Cruelty
April 05, 2019
The Topic I Have Neglected While Writing at The Latest
March 27, 2019
Why Not Let Them Vote?
March 21, 2019
Boycotts, Divestments, and Sanctions
March 12, 2019
Hypocrisy and Representative Omar
March 06, 2019
Stop Freaking Out About Momo
February 28, 2019
On Jussie Smollett and the True Cost of His Deceit
February 21, 2019
Seeing is Believing
February 10, 2019
Proposed MLB Rule Changes Will Not Make Baseball Better
February 07, 2019
4th Period: Biblical Literacy 101
February 01, 2019
Musings on Immigration from a Suburban Dallas Apartment
January 26, 2019
How I Changed My Mind on Circumcision
January 17, 2019
Race and the Conservative Bloc
January 11, 2019
Five Predictions for 2019 Involving President Trump
December 27, 2018
The Republic
December 15, 2018
John Allen Chau, Imperialist
November 28, 2018
A Tale of Two Email Addresses
November 21, 2018
Science Denial is Bipartisan, But...
November 16, 2018
Progressive Wins in the 2018 Mid-Terms
November 07, 2018
President Trump Goes Full "Willie Horton" Ahead of the Mid-Terms
November 02, 2018
Musings on President Trump's Inability to Tell the Truth
October 23, 2018
DeVos v. Education
October 20, 2018
Yet Another Voter ID Controversy
October 11, 2018
Another Year, Another Columbus Day
October 06, 2018
South Park Continues to Perfectly Lampoon All of Us
October 03, 2018
Facebook's White Supremacy Problem
September 20, 2018
U.S. v. The Hague
September 14, 2018
Ted Cruz's Sad, Pathetic Attempt to Debase Beto O'Rourke
September 03, 2018
Trump Christianity
August 30, 2018
Knock 'Em All Down
August 21, 2018
Trump's Alleged N-Word Tape: Why It Shouldn't Matter
August 16, 2018
Make Outer Space Great Again! Join the Space Force!
August 10, 2018
Meet QAnon: The Internet's New Experiment in Gullibility
August 01, 2018
Virginia Kruta's Article: An Alternate Perspective
July 27, 2018
So, Trump's Military Parade Will Be Expensive
July 19, 2018
Why #MeToo Has Failed American Inmates
July 10, 2018
Why Execute Scott Dozier?
July 04, 2018
Shocked By U.S. Human Rights Violations? Come On, Man...
June 28, 2018
In Defense of Communication
June 21, 2018
Making Sense of Absolutely Nothing
June 15, 2018
How Does Scott Pruitt Still Have a Job?
June 08, 2018
Trump's Train of Pardons: A Love Story
June 02, 2018
The NFL's Brand-Spankin' New Position on Protest
May 24, 2018
To Put The President's 'Animals' Comment in Context
May 17, 2018
Sex, Lies and Rudy Giuliani
May 03, 2018
Alex Jones Is the Worst Kind of Free Speech
April 19, 2018
#BoycottNestle
April 12, 2018
Where Do We Draw the Line?
April 05, 2018
Sponsored by the Donald Trump Association of Already-Tried (And Generally Failed) Solutions
March 29, 2018
It's Time to Abandon 'In God We Trust'
March 22, 2018
